Saturday, April 23, 2011

%#&! My Mother Used to Say

Cele & Barbara 1945

My mother never swore, except for hell and damn once in a while. Towards the end of her life she learned to say crap from her teenagers.

Cele, Jane, Bill & Barbara

But she did have a nice vocabulary for difficult situations that was a combination of conventional swearing and Catholic liturgy.

My favorite was "GOD grant me grace and patience!" with a heavy emphasis on the first word.


Another was "HO-ly Mother of God!" with the emphasis on the Ho in Holy.

These exclamations are, of course, delicate substitutes for "Gosh darn it" and "Holy Moly."

It's a good thing she wasn't around for the late 1960s and '70s when we learned to swear from other sources. It may have all been Holden Caulfield's fault.

I am guessing she learned to swear from her mother.

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